The man in the middle

Okay. Small rant here in the run-up to OVGE and the “live” debut of VWORP!1. It’s taken me long enough to get this book out the door that I’ve watched my good friend Rob O’Hara get two books out the door, and I’ve had time to take in how he’s handled presentation and marketing a bit (not to mention that he provides that advice freely from the get-go). Accordingly, I spent a little bit of money – not a whole lot, but more than I usually do – on signage and presentation for OVGE this year. I had stuff made by other folks instead of rolling my own out of my long-suffering inkjet printer.

And then… I waited for it to show up. And watched the package tracking across two different sites; one vital piece of the puzzle was on its way via FedEx, the other via UPS. And watched. And watched. And waited. And waited.

Okay, here’s the deal. A fun little fact for everyone who pisses and moans about the U.S. Postal Service, and everyone who gets their panties in a wad, and everyone who says “That’s it! Screw the post office, they beat the crap out of my packages, I’m using UPS for everything from now on!”

Even if you ship via UPS or FedEx, your package is routed through the U.S. postal system anyway. You have no choice in the matter. Neither do UPS or FedEx. They’re piggybacking on the existing infrastructure because it’s not like they have a better one in place that they’ve built themselves. As much as you think you’re sidestepping the postal system, you’re not, because… you can’t.

Those long stretches where no tracking or location information is available? That’s where your package is. It’s been handed off to the tender mercies of the Postal Service, and FedEx and UPS sure as hell don’t want to come out and tell you that, because then you’ll be saying “WTF? Why did I just pay a premium to avoid using the Postal Service when I could have just cut out the middle man (and his upcharge)?”

Seriously. Want to send me something? Just pop it in the mail. It’s cheaper for you, and yes, it’ll get here faster, and heaven knows the USPS could use the money, since they continue to show staggering losses based primarily on the fact that Congress requires the USPS to pre-fund its retirement and pension fund 75 years ahead of time, something that no other federal agency, not even the Congress itself and not even the military, is required to do (but you can sure as hell bet that Congress is dipping into that 75 years worth of money without telling anyone about it). (Congress probably needs to replace the postmaster general with someone competent, too, but hey, I’m probably asking too much now.)