Fisher-Price presents: My First Shiner

You can tell Evan’s my kid by the way he fights sleep. That is to say, he isn’t merely resisting the notion of closing his eyes and surrendering consciousness – he’s actively trying to kick sleep’s ass so he can stay awake all hours like Daddy does. This is the cause of some almighty screaming crying fits at night, as well as lots of flailing about. He’s put an inexplicable scratch on the right side of his own nose that I don’t look forward to explaining at his next doctor’s visit. And now my son Sluggo has managed to punch himself just below the right eye and cause a bit of swelling. 😯

Most of the time he’s such a good baby that I kid myself into thinking hey, we’re not going to swaddle tonight. When he comes up with little war wounds like this, a day before he’s gonna be two months old, I think maybe I need to reassess that. My wife’s gonna love seeing this when she wakes up. I’ll probably get DHS called on me. Or DHL…will be paid by DHS…to come get me. And take me to the DMV. Something like that. It’s way late for me, can you tell?

One added note – as soon as I turned the lights out after taking the above post-feeding, post-diaper-change, post-burping photo, I heard a little yelp that signifies a Binky Blast. I figured hey, I’ve got a camera with night vision, I’ll use that rather than turn the light back on. Boy, did I get a surprise – Evan’s flying bears were under attack!

The scary thing is, that cat wasn’t there five seconds before when I turned the light out. Because I have to lean over where he’s perched to do that. How in the world did he get up there so quietly?

Tune in next time for Crouching Tiger, Hidden Binky, episode 2: Flying Bears, Our Newest Endangered Species. Sleep well, baby boy. Sleep lightly.