Giddyup
My wife woke me up this morning to make sure I could get into town in time to hobble my way to a big scale to pick up a new microwave oven that we need (our old one went kaput a couple of weeks ago). When she couldn’t get me to wake right up right then, she asked if I had taken another pain pill, and I said something to the effect of “Good Lord, no, woman. I’m still having trouble getting out from under the first one!”
Then I saw the spam subject header “posthumous pony” and instantly wrote the first verse of a country & western song in my head. If the following does not convince you that I’m not still ‘under the influence,’ nothing will.
I’m gonna be your posthumous pony
I’m gonna be your undead steed
When you go ridin’ with yer three brotherrrrs
I’m the only zombie horse you’ll need.
See if you can guess who the riders (the aforementioned brotherrrrs) are (not sure how else I’m supposed to phonetically imply a C&W drawl, sorry). Go on, guess.
And people put this kind of stuff into their bloodstreams on purpose? For fun? Drugs are bad, mmmmmmkay? I think I’m going to settle for soaking my feet and sitting still, because I’m sure as hell not taking any more of those pain pills if I can help it.… Read more
